Difficult conversations don’t have to be so difficult

Difficult conversations don’t have to be so difficult.

Difficult conversations are stressful before, during and after they happen.


They don’t have to be.

There are tools we can use to feel more confident, have better outcomes and maintain relationships intact. Here’s how.

Change your mindset
If you label a conversation as difficult, it’s likely you feel nervous about it. If you reframe it in a positive light, you can manage it with confidence. For example, you’re not telling your boss no, you’re offering an alternative solution.

Plan but don’t script
Preparing for a difficult conversation often looks like writing a script for a monologue, mentally or on paper. This however can hinder your ability to deal with objections or with the conversation going off script. Write down your key points, in simple and clear language, including a range of possible responses. This will help anchor your conversation and allow for flexibility.

Acknowledge your counterpart’s perspective
Do you know how the other person is feeling? If you don’t, make sure to acknowledge it and ask them. This shows you are open to understanding the other point of view, it gives you an opportunity to find an overlap between perspectives, and helps both of you lower the guard.

Give something back
If the difficult conversation puts the other person in a challenging position, ask yourself if there is something you can give back. If you have to say no, offer an alternative solution. If you have to give negative feedback, be constructive and offer help and guidance.

Get the low-down on how to handle difficult conversations in this article by the Harvard Business Review.

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